A Wonderful Weekend Of Withdrawal Symptoms...

How was everyone's weekend? Good I hope! Well, mine was spent shivering with a headache feeling like vomiting. Yes, that's right. My body was going through withdrawal symptoms. To make matters worse, I had a trade show that I had to do. I met a super nice girl and ended up having a great time (with her...Not at the trade show..Man oh man...NEVER AGAIN) even though I felt like dying. So, because I was dealing with this, I clearly had no painkillers to take...I was living on advil...About 8-12 a day. I'm still getting really bad migraines, but I think that's a mix of the new medication and tension headaches. I'm also getting waves of nausea...Again, probably the new meds. Okay, I'm totally off track...Right! So, my weekend was awful! I had a breakdown on Sunday...Not cool. Hopefully the new medication will help with that. My new medication, if you're wondering, is called 'Celexa' Its an anti-depressant. I'm not afraid to admit that yes, I am probably depressed. I've had a ton of symptoms of it and my emotions have been crazy lately. The reason I have no issues admitting it is for one reason, and that reason is this; I am in CONSTANT pain. Every single day of my life. I can't do the things I used to be able to, I've put on a ton of weight, I have problems walking, I have problems standing, I have problems sitting, and altogether life is 10x harder than it used to be. My accident changed me. Completely and totally changed who I am. I used to be a fun, outgoing, active person. And I still am sort of...As much as I can be...But it's hard to be cheery when you're body is always screaming at you. I've stopped doing things, I barely even go to physio anymore. I don't see a point, I will admit, I have lost all hope. It's will be three years on May fourth and I am still at this point.

Oh, I got my blood work back. Low iron apparently. Probably because I donate. But she said not enough to make me this tired all the time. So hopefully the meds will help with that. I should also add, that I won't be taking painkillers anymore. I never EVER want to go through what I did EVER again. Honestly, Friday I just laid in bed freezing with the heating blanket on high and four other blankets on. Didn't sleep, I couldn't. Just laid there...It was AWFUL. I will deal with my pain...and...I don't know...Figure it out. I had a very bad night Monday night. It was hard, but I cried, and breathed and powered through it...So we'll see how this goes...